The Emergence of Married Bachelors

I won’t call it a new trend because it has been around for a while and has come to stay. However, I wonder how it became so acceptable. Some years ago, it was considered an anomaly. Some years ago, to be an absentee father was totally wrong. Some years ago, to live apart from your legally married wife was termed immoral (unless you had a harem). Some years ago, it was not a choice to live apart from your family. Those who lived apart for genuine reasons such as work, war, education; longed for when they would live together as a family. In the past, family values were passed from generation to generation by fathers while mothers held those values and ensured they were adhered to in the family unit.

Absent Fathers_Married Bachelors

Fast forward to this generation, it has become a fad to live separately. Hmm……the things this generation does; at times, I wonder what the next generation would do. Blame it on technology! It is a technology driven world. Yeah, right! I wonder if technology also helps in managing a bonded family. I hear Skype, Face time, Snapchat, Hangouts, Viber, Tango, WeChat etc. Does technology train a child or help the father see those habits that need to be quickly nipped in the bud? Does technology have arms to hug a child early in the morning or late at night? Does technology give a child the warm assurance when he is scared of shadows at night? Does technology get into bed with a child to allay his fears when he is having nightmares? Does technology whip a child in the butt when he misbehaves? Does technology sit with a child to assist with homework brought back from school? Does technology give a child good night kisses?

Absent Father_Married Bachelors 2

I wonder if training a child has now become the sole duty of the mother alone. I hear a bad child is the mother’s. So if the good child is the father’s and the father is an absentee, is it right for him to also claim the good child as his? Being that, the mother wore both the father and mother hat.

The emotional needs of the wife is another topic for discussion. If marriage is for companionship, then why marry and live apart on purpose? Why burn with passion and suffer in solitude when you have paid the price in full for uninterrupted satisfaction. Sincerely, I need valid answers to these questions.

Married bachelors

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About Olubukola

Olubukola is a writer and blogger. She loves reading and imaginative writing. She has authored two romance stories namely “Second Chances” and “To Love and to Hold” which have been published on and on Her author page on Amazon is Olubukola is the creative director of NDJs; a fashion label, whose mission is to create and provide classy yet simple pieces with African prints for the everyday woman regardless of the function she finds herself in. Asides writing, reading and fashion designing, Olubukola is also passionate about inspiring music, dance and arts. She currently works and lives with her family in Lagos, Nigeria.

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